I just got back from jogging, during which I was mocked by two fat, Latina teenagers who referred to me as "Martha Stewart."
Monday, November 29, 2004
A Deadhead sticker on a Cadillac?
I saw a "No War For Oil" bumper sticker on an SUV yesterday. Don't get me started.
I saw a "No War For Oil" bumper sticker on an SUV yesterday. Don't get me started.
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Random request...anyone want to hook me up with an mp3 or wav of Aimee Mann's "Mr. Harris?" If you have the album "Whatever," you have it. Rick and I used to own that CD, but it was stolen in the Great Moving Truck Ripoff of 2002.
Friday, November 26, 2004
The Decline and Fall of America Continues
As I've said before, I've been trying to think good thoughts about what's left of this country. One of the things I silently gave thanks for yesterday was that, despite the increasingly anti-intellectual and corporatized nature of this nation, we still have a free public library system.
It turns out the city of Salinas, CA will be closing all three of its public libraries soon. To top off the irony, this is John Steinbeck's hometown. One of the libraries is named after him; another after another champion of the rights of the poor: Cesar Chavez. (There are many articles about this, including one on the front page of the LA Times, but here's one that doesn't require registration, as far as I can tell.)
Salinas is a poor town, and voters rejected a tax measure that would have saved the libraries. There were several reasons: the proposition was worded poorly and didn't specifically mention the library, voters thought the city would find some other way to pay for the libraries if the tax measure was defeated, and some voters simply don't want their taxes raised for any reason.
What neither of the articles I've read mentioned is that perhaps the poor, hard-workign adults of Salinas failed to see the library as part of their (and others') children's education. Got a small, overcrowded house? You do your homework at the library, if you do it at all. Got a crappy school system? You supplement it with books from the library (based on my admittedly limited experience with the students, parents, and alumni of the deeply troubled LA schools). Can't afford a computer? Go to the library. Unemployed? Read want ads and job sites at the library. In short, as much good as public libraries do the middle class -- and that's a lot -- they do exponentially more for the poor.
I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but damn.
As I've said before, I've been trying to think good thoughts about what's left of this country. One of the things I silently gave thanks for yesterday was that, despite the increasingly anti-intellectual and corporatized nature of this nation, we still have a free public library system.
It turns out the city of Salinas, CA will be closing all three of its public libraries soon. To top off the irony, this is John Steinbeck's hometown. One of the libraries is named after him; another after another champion of the rights of the poor: Cesar Chavez. (There are many articles about this, including one on the front page of the LA Times, but here's one that doesn't require registration, as far as I can tell.)
Salinas is a poor town, and voters rejected a tax measure that would have saved the libraries. There were several reasons: the proposition was worded poorly and didn't specifically mention the library, voters thought the city would find some other way to pay for the libraries if the tax measure was defeated, and some voters simply don't want their taxes raised for any reason.
What neither of the articles I've read mentioned is that perhaps the poor, hard-workign adults of Salinas failed to see the library as part of their (and others') children's education. Got a small, overcrowded house? You do your homework at the library, if you do it at all. Got a crappy school system? You supplement it with books from the library (based on my admittedly limited experience with the students, parents, and alumni of the deeply troubled LA schools). Can't afford a computer? Go to the library. Unemployed? Read want ads and job sites at the library. In short, as much good as public libraries do the middle class -- and that's a lot -- they do exponentially more for the poor.
I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but damn.
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
Another Thanksgiving. First, go read this viewpoint on the history of the holiday. No, it's not another self-flogging about the raw deal we dealt the Indians; it's more about how Thanksgiving really started as "a series of quasi-religious celebrations to say with joy 'our enemies are dead, but we are not! Thanks, God!'"
Whatever the historical implications, I do approve of the what-I-should-be-thankful-for slice of the modern observance, if not the official beginning of the Annual National Credit Card Fest. It's been very hard to think positive lately. I've had a tough year and so has the world. But I promise to try.
Whatever the historical implications, I do approve of the what-I-should-be-thankful-for slice of the modern observance, if not the official beginning of the Annual National Credit Card Fest. It's been very hard to think positive lately. I've had a tough year and so has the world. But I promise to try.
Monday, November 22, 2004
Is it messed up that going to a multi-zillion dollar neighborhood once a week depresses me more than my daily visit to the barrio?
There are these people in Beverly Hills 90210 I see on Mondays. Originally, I was to help Sixth Grade Rich Girl and Seventh Grade Rich Girl with math. Sixth Grade Rich Girl was a beast: interrupted, ignored, gave attitude, asked me to do her homework for her, was generally snotty and mean. Apparently she was not used to being told such behavior is unacceptable, and apparently her father does whatever she tells him to, so I was not asked to see her again. No loss (for me).
I still see her sister, Seventh Grade Rich Girl, who is much nicer but somewhat annoying in that inevitable 90210 way. She asks me a lot of random questions, trying to wheedle fun facts and personal tidbits out of me. (How tall are you? How cold is it in New York? Where else do you teach? Really? EAST LA?! What do they wear? Do they have malls?) I know this is mostly a distraction ploy, but she does seem rather fascinated by the mellow middle-class chick who tells her not to worry so much about getting into a good high school. *eyeroll*
Right after the election, she asked me who I voted for. I knew from various propaganda around the property and from the Bush/Cheney sticker on her binder that I was going to give the "wrong" answer, so I thought of a way to stretch the truth and justify it -- after all, I might be the only liberal this kid talks to all year, so I'd better sound reasonable and not bash her daddy's idol. "Well, I wasn't really happy with either candidate [true], but I lived in Massachusetts for a long time [true], so I had a better idea of what John Kerry was really like than most people [true] because his campaign was pretty bad [true] so I was comfortable voting for him in the end [false]."
Dead silence.
"Just curious," she said, showing me the Bush/Cheney sticker.
"Hey," I said, "We can have a difference of opinion. This is America." Then I swallowed the rising vomit generated by that hollow tension-smoothing statement, and got back to math.
Then there's the issue of their sister, First Grade Rich Girl. Her dad makes me see her sometimes, and do things like make her count backwards from 20, or forwards by 2's or 5's. This is homework help any non-retarded parent could easily provide, but you get the feeling these parents don't do too much except indoctrinate.
(Case in point: First Grade Rich Girl once went on about how the housekeeper was "pretty smart for a Spanish person" because she could keep up with Girl's first-grade math. I explained that numbers work the same way in every language, and people who don't speak English aren't any less smart than we are necessarily, and she backed up her own argument by yelling loudly for water and being amused that the housekeeper didn't turn respond. Right, and incidentally, I'm sure these morally upstanding Bush voters checked her papers before hiring her, and are paying her the federally-mandated minimum wage...)
Anyway, First Grade Rich Girl is obviously very lonely, doing everything but clinging to me to prevent me from leaving each week. Tonight, she was very put out that I wouldn't stay to hear her read "Green Eggs and Ham" to me. I hate to drag out the poor-little-rich-girl cliche, but how sad, really, being a child in a mansion with no one to play with, getting effectively raised by someone who doesn't speak your native tongue. Get this kid a playgroup or something!
The only redeeming feature to this gig -- other than the fact that it's all fodder for the blog, my eventual memoirs, and perhaps next year's bad novel -- is that I wind up back in the car just in time to listen to Henry Rollins' radio show on the drive home. Now, blasting gansta rap or industrial music in 90210 is pretty good, but Henry Rollins is even better. He's the only DJ I can stand to hear talk for long periods of time, and he plays crazy shit from all over the genre map. Not just eclectic for the sake of eclecticism, every track is good. The website has an annotated playlist for each week's show, including tidbits like:
* "This is one of the many many great Cat Stevens songs. Do you remember when ol’ Cat was down with the fatwa issued against Salmon Rushdie? That made me want to smack this little singer-songwriter into the bottom of Lemmy’s gym bag. Jihad up on that bitch!"
* "I don’t know a damn thing about the singer, King Diamond besides the fact that he made me laugh my ass off when I saw him on MTV once talking about Satan. The make-up was great and you can’t help thinking what he would have done, looking like that walking through Brooklyn. Satan can’t help you in Red Hook."
* "It’s Miles Davis, critic boy! Kneel at his greatness, you overpaid underachieving swine!"
His on-air commentary is that amusing, too. (You can stream old shows. Yes!) I feel cooler just listening, cooler for living in a city that has a radio station that thought to hire Henry Rollins. And suddenly LA is somehow worth my while again.
There are these people in Beverly Hills 90210 I see on Mondays. Originally, I was to help Sixth Grade Rich Girl and Seventh Grade Rich Girl with math. Sixth Grade Rich Girl was a beast: interrupted, ignored, gave attitude, asked me to do her homework for her, was generally snotty and mean. Apparently she was not used to being told such behavior is unacceptable, and apparently her father does whatever she tells him to, so I was not asked to see her again. No loss (for me).
I still see her sister, Seventh Grade Rich Girl, who is much nicer but somewhat annoying in that inevitable 90210 way. She asks me a lot of random questions, trying to wheedle fun facts and personal tidbits out of me. (How tall are you? How cold is it in New York? Where else do you teach? Really? EAST LA?! What do they wear? Do they have malls?) I know this is mostly a distraction ploy, but she does seem rather fascinated by the mellow middle-class chick who tells her not to worry so much about getting into a good high school. *eyeroll*
Right after the election, she asked me who I voted for. I knew from various propaganda around the property and from the Bush/Cheney sticker on her binder that I was going to give the "wrong" answer, so I thought of a way to stretch the truth and justify it -- after all, I might be the only liberal this kid talks to all year, so I'd better sound reasonable and not bash her daddy's idol. "Well, I wasn't really happy with either candidate [true], but I lived in Massachusetts for a long time [true], so I had a better idea of what John Kerry was really like than most people [true] because his campaign was pretty bad [true] so I was comfortable voting for him in the end [false]."
Dead silence.
"Just curious," she said, showing me the Bush/Cheney sticker.
"Hey," I said, "We can have a difference of opinion. This is America." Then I swallowed the rising vomit generated by that hollow tension-smoothing statement, and got back to math.
Then there's the issue of their sister, First Grade Rich Girl. Her dad makes me see her sometimes, and do things like make her count backwards from 20, or forwards by 2's or 5's. This is homework help any non-retarded parent could easily provide, but you get the feeling these parents don't do too much except indoctrinate.
(Case in point: First Grade Rich Girl once went on about how the housekeeper was "pretty smart for a Spanish person" because she could keep up with Girl's first-grade math. I explained that numbers work the same way in every language, and people who don't speak English aren't any less smart than we are necessarily, and she backed up her own argument by yelling loudly for water and being amused that the housekeeper didn't turn respond. Right, and incidentally, I'm sure these morally upstanding Bush voters checked her papers before hiring her, and are paying her the federally-mandated minimum wage...)
Anyway, First Grade Rich Girl is obviously very lonely, doing everything but clinging to me to prevent me from leaving each week. Tonight, she was very put out that I wouldn't stay to hear her read "Green Eggs and Ham" to me. I hate to drag out the poor-little-rich-girl cliche, but how sad, really, being a child in a mansion with no one to play with, getting effectively raised by someone who doesn't speak your native tongue. Get this kid a playgroup or something!
The only redeeming feature to this gig -- other than the fact that it's all fodder for the blog, my eventual memoirs, and perhaps next year's bad novel -- is that I wind up back in the car just in time to listen to Henry Rollins' radio show on the drive home. Now, blasting gansta rap or industrial music in 90210 is pretty good, but Henry Rollins is even better. He's the only DJ I can stand to hear talk for long periods of time, and he plays crazy shit from all over the genre map. Not just eclectic for the sake of eclecticism, every track is good. The website has an annotated playlist for each week's show, including tidbits like:
* "This is one of the many many great Cat Stevens songs. Do you remember when ol’ Cat was down with the fatwa issued against Salmon Rushdie? That made me want to smack this little singer-songwriter into the bottom of Lemmy’s gym bag. Jihad up on that bitch!"
* "I don’t know a damn thing about the singer, King Diamond besides the fact that he made me laugh my ass off when I saw him on MTV once talking about Satan. The make-up was great and you can’t help thinking what he would have done, looking like that walking through Brooklyn. Satan can’t help you in Red Hook."
* "It’s Miles Davis, critic boy! Kneel at his greatness, you overpaid underachieving swine!"
His on-air commentary is that amusing, too. (You can stream old shows. Yes!) I feel cooler just listening, cooler for living in a city that has a radio station that thought to hire Henry Rollins. And suddenly LA is somehow worth my while again.
Saturday, November 20, 2004
More advice for stupid times
One of my favorite crazy old white men, not so far off from the eariler Maya Angelou wisdom:
"When you're born into this world, you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in this country, you get a front row seat. I say: sit back and enjoy the show."
--George Carlin
For instance, last night at The Neighborhood Dive, I was engaged in unwanted conversation -- by a stumbling 49-year-old bricklayer spouting off trivia from the history of rock drumming -- from the moment I walked in. My choices were:
a) Finish my beer and get out of here.
b) Well, go with the flow for now, then finish this second beer and get out of here, since the bartender just bought me a pint for putting up with this guy (after assuring me that he's been coming in for years and is harmless).
c) Stick around long enough for Rick to show up, because Rick really needs to see this spectacle. Wind up buddies with the guy, choosing jukebox selections with him and allowing him to buy me the third beer than allowed his ramblings to become more entertaining than annoying.
Yeah, you know what I picked.
The other notable character from the dive last night was the guy who showed up, announced (apparently sober) "My dog is outside. Can I have a vodka tonic?"
The bartender replied, "For your dog?"
"No. My dog is outside. But *I* want a vodka tonic. For myself."
The bartender and I exchanged a look, and she poured the dude's drink.
He wanted to pay with a credit card, and she told him there was a $10 limit. He agreed. The card was declined. "Try it again, it's new," he said. Declined again. The bartender told him where he could find an ATM, and he left his drink on the bar and never came back.
Earlier, another bar parton had ordered a plate of nachos, paid, and then left without a bite or a word.
"The vodka tonic guy is out smoking a bowl with the nachos guy," I suggested.
"Nah," said the bartender. "The nachos guy is an undercover cop."
Hell, when you live in LA, you get to sit on the friggin' stage of the freak show.
One of my favorite crazy old white men, not so far off from the eariler Maya Angelou wisdom:
"When you're born into this world, you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in this country, you get a front row seat. I say: sit back and enjoy the show."
--George Carlin
For instance, last night at The Neighborhood Dive, I was engaged in unwanted conversation -- by a stumbling 49-year-old bricklayer spouting off trivia from the history of rock drumming -- from the moment I walked in. My choices were:
a) Finish my beer and get out of here.
b) Well, go with the flow for now, then finish this second beer and get out of here, since the bartender just bought me a pint for putting up with this guy (after assuring me that he's been coming in for years and is harmless).
c) Stick around long enough for Rick to show up, because Rick really needs to see this spectacle. Wind up buddies with the guy, choosing jukebox selections with him and allowing him to buy me the third beer than allowed his ramblings to become more entertaining than annoying.
Yeah, you know what I picked.
The other notable character from the dive last night was the guy who showed up, announced (apparently sober) "My dog is outside. Can I have a vodka tonic?"
The bartender replied, "For your dog?"
"No. My dog is outside. But *I* want a vodka tonic. For myself."
The bartender and I exchanged a look, and she poured the dude's drink.
He wanted to pay with a credit card, and she told him there was a $10 limit. He agreed. The card was declined. "Try it again, it's new," he said. Declined again. The bartender told him where he could find an ATM, and he left his drink on the bar and never came back.
Earlier, another bar parton had ordered a plate of nachos, paid, and then left without a bite or a word.
"The vodka tonic guy is out smoking a bowl with the nachos guy," I suggested.
"Nah," said the bartender. "The nachos guy is an undercover cop."
Hell, when you live in LA, you get to sit on the friggin' stage of the freak show.
Labels: drunken old guys
Thursday, November 18, 2004
This is petty, but...why does half a cup of cottage cheese have 14% of my daily sodium but only 8% of my daily calcium? I'm not particularly worried about calcium or sodium (at least until my genetic predisposition to bone disease and heart disease kick in) but this seems wrong. Why does dairy curd need salt, anyway?
Tin foil hats for everybody!
Okay, by now the idea that Diebold and/or Dubya could have effed up/rigged the election is being dismissed as a "conspiracy theory." Ha ha. Yeah. Whatever. I'll relax when we count our presidential votes as meticulously as San Diego counts their mayoral votes (see two entries ago).
BUT, what we really need is some fresh, new conspiracy theories.
Me talking out my butt:
* BushCo are intentionally weakening the dollar so Americans can't afford to travel outside the country and potentially have their horizons expanded.
* The media is state-controlled, and has been for a while. "Liberal" viewpoints on the likes of CNN are planted to give a false air of objectivity.
* Arafat was poisoned by the CIA so that BushCo could have an opening to try and take over another piece of the Middle East.
* Dubya will find a way to have a third term.
Various friends of mine talking out their butts:
* The Republicans have introduced mind-control agents into the water, so only people who filter their water were capable of voting for Kerry. This is one thing both urban voters and suburban blue state yuppie voters have in common, after all.
* The media is starting to show really terrible Jewish people on reality shows, in contrast to really nice evangelical Christians on the same show, as seen on last week's Trading Spouses -- thus beginning to build the case for eventually rounding us up.
Add your own! Fun for the whole family!
Okay, by now the idea that Diebold and/or Dubya could have effed up/rigged the election is being dismissed as a "conspiracy theory." Ha ha. Yeah. Whatever. I'll relax when we count our presidential votes as meticulously as San Diego counts their mayoral votes (see two entries ago).
BUT, what we really need is some fresh, new conspiracy theories.
Me talking out my butt:
* BushCo are intentionally weakening the dollar so Americans can't afford to travel outside the country and potentially have their horizons expanded.
* The media is state-controlled, and has been for a while. "Liberal" viewpoints on the likes of CNN are planted to give a false air of objectivity.
* Arafat was poisoned by the CIA so that BushCo could have an opening to try and take over another piece of the Middle East.
* Dubya will find a way to have a third term.
Various friends of mine talking out their butts:
* The Republicans have introduced mind-control agents into the water, so only people who filter their water were capable of voting for Kerry. This is one thing both urban voters and suburban blue state yuppie voters have in common, after all.
* The media is starting to show really terrible Jewish people on reality shows, in contrast to really nice evangelical Christians on the same show, as seen on last week's Trading Spouses -- thus beginning to build the case for eventually rounding us up.
Add your own! Fun for the whole family!
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
"It is imperative that a woman keep her sense of humor intact and at the ready. She must see, even if only in secret, that she is the funniest, looniest woman in her world, which she should also see as being the most absurd world of all times.
-- Maya Angelou
-- Maya Angelou
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
What the hell is going on?
The Secretary of State is out. The Attorney General is out. The Commerce Secretary is out. The Agriculture and Education Secretaries are out. The chairman of the Republican National Committee is out. It seems like half the CIA is out. Rumor has it the Homeland Security Chief, Health and Human Services Secretary, a U.S. trade representative, the Labor Secretary, and the Transportation Secretary will all be out soon. Is Bush cleaning house to replace all the high-level posts with even bigger nutjobs, or are even the nutjobs fleeing the sinking ship that is the White House? I'm sure Colin Powell got forced out to make room for Condi -- who regularly PRAYS WITH DUBYA, by the way -- but why would Ashcroft quit? What does he know that I don't?
Meanwhile, both the state of Washington and the city of San Diego are still carefully counting and certifying their votes for governor and mayor, respectively. Could the nation as a whole learn something from this, pretty please? Maybe by 2008?
Oh, and the state of California is considering putting a Big Brother device our cars to tax us by how many miles we drive -- partially because the current gas tax favors hybrids and little cars over gas guzzlers.
God bless America.
The Secretary of State is out. The Attorney General is out. The Commerce Secretary is out. The Agriculture and Education Secretaries are out. The chairman of the Republican National Committee is out. It seems like half the CIA is out. Rumor has it the Homeland Security Chief, Health and Human Services Secretary, a U.S. trade representative, the Labor Secretary, and the Transportation Secretary will all be out soon. Is Bush cleaning house to replace all the high-level posts with even bigger nutjobs, or are even the nutjobs fleeing the sinking ship that is the White House? I'm sure Colin Powell got forced out to make room for Condi -- who regularly PRAYS WITH DUBYA, by the way -- but why would Ashcroft quit? What does he know that I don't?
Meanwhile, both the state of Washington and the city of San Diego are still carefully counting and certifying their votes for governor and mayor, respectively. Could the nation as a whole learn something from this, pretty please? Maybe by 2008?
Oh, and the state of California is considering putting a Big Brother device our cars to tax us by how many miles we drive -- partially because the current gas tax favors hybrids and little cars over gas guzzlers.
God bless America.
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
Something else you've probably already seen by now is Sorry Everybody where Americans apologize to the world for electing a dumbass. An increasing number of non-Americans (mostly Germans!) have posted acceptances and encouragement. The site is photo-based, and it's heartening to see the people who are as depressed/pissed as I am right now. It's 154 pages and counting.
I've seen the light! Thank you, Oklahoma!
"The Daily Show," November 3, 2004:
John Stewart: If [terrorism and gay marriage] are the two major issues concerning voters, and again, why would New York City, which really has the most significant gay population in the country and has already had the most significant terrorist attack in the country, vote overwhelmingly for Kerry?
Steven Colbert: Well, here's the thing, John. We in New York are too close to the terrorism and the gay people. Only the red states with the advantage of a safe distance can take in the whole picture and clearly see what we should do about those issues. And so, on behalf of everyone living in the blue states, I'd like to thank the red states for saving us from ourselves.
(Thanks to this site for the exact Daily Show quotes so I didn't have to paraphrase. I don't know where that Jesusland map came from, but it's been forwarded to me at least three times).
"The Daily Show," November 3, 2004:
John Stewart: If [terrorism and gay marriage] are the two major issues concerning voters, and again, why would New York City, which really has the most significant gay population in the country and has already had the most significant terrorist attack in the country, vote overwhelmingly for Kerry?
Steven Colbert: Well, here's the thing, John. We in New York are too close to the terrorism and the gay people. Only the red states with the advantage of a safe distance can take in the whole picture and clearly see what we should do about those issues. And so, on behalf of everyone living in the blue states, I'd like to thank the red states for saving us from ourselves.
(Thanks to this site for the exact Daily Show quotes so I didn't have to paraphrase. I don't know where that Jesusland map came from, but it's been forwarded to me at least three times).
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Blogging: Cheaper than therapy for two goddamn Bush administrations in a row
That last post wasn't my finest moment. This one won't be, either.
Partial list of who/what I'm angry at right now, other than the generic catch-all "Bush voters:"
1) The "youth vote." Where the hell were you losers? Then again, see below:
2) Democrats who keep voting for the most uninspiring, moderate, vague, ball-less candidate thinking those traits mean "electable." Two lost elections later, don't we know it doesn't? (Yes, I know Gore won the popular vote and had the electoral vote stolen from him. The fact that it was that close is still a loss for the Democratic party. The vice president of a successful presidency versus a recovering cokehead, DWI-convicted, born-again wingnut chimp should have been a blowout.)
3) And who the hell decided that Iowa and New Hampshire get almost sole power to pick our Democratic candidate, anyway?
4) The media that decided Howard Dean couldn't be president because he YELLED THE NAMES OF SOME STATES in enthusiasm at a FREAKIN' CAMPAIGN RALLY. It's not like he was screaming obscenities in church.
5) All the people that ate #4 with a spoon because they need to be told what to think.
6) That said, Fox News and anyone who watches it without irony.
7) Married American women. Consider this: men vote for Bush and women vote for Kerry, but married women vote for Bush and single woman vote for Kerry. That tells me that even in the year 2004, women are still voting for whoever their husband tells them to.
8) Whoever decided that Ohio should have FEWER voting machines than in 2000 despite the surge in voter registration. I'm not convinced Ohio got counted correctly amid all the provisional balloting nonsense and 5-hour lines.
9) Anyone who supports a war but expects someone else, or someone else's son/daughter, to fight it.
10) Anyone who thinks it should be illegal for 10% of the population to marry someone they love.
11) Californians who don't think medium- and large-sized companies should have to give their employees health insurance. Want to bet these same people are against the welfare-type health benefits most uninsured people have to use instead?
12) John McCain, because I think if he'd admitted he hates Bush, Kerry could have taken Arizona.
13) I cannot go any further, because I'm too depressed to be as angry as I should be. Dammit.
That last post wasn't my finest moment. This one won't be, either.
Partial list of who/what I'm angry at right now, other than the generic catch-all "Bush voters:"
1) The "youth vote." Where the hell were you losers? Then again, see below:
2) Democrats who keep voting for the most uninspiring, moderate, vague, ball-less candidate thinking those traits mean "electable." Two lost elections later, don't we know it doesn't? (Yes, I know Gore won the popular vote and had the electoral vote stolen from him. The fact that it was that close is still a loss for the Democratic party. The vice president of a successful presidency versus a recovering cokehead, DWI-convicted, born-again wingnut chimp should have been a blowout.)
3) And who the hell decided that Iowa and New Hampshire get almost sole power to pick our Democratic candidate, anyway?
4) The media that decided Howard Dean couldn't be president because he YELLED THE NAMES OF SOME STATES in enthusiasm at a FREAKIN' CAMPAIGN RALLY. It's not like he was screaming obscenities in church.
5) All the people that ate #4 with a spoon because they need to be told what to think.
6) That said, Fox News and anyone who watches it without irony.
7) Married American women. Consider this: men vote for Bush and women vote for Kerry, but married women vote for Bush and single woman vote for Kerry. That tells me that even in the year 2004, women are still voting for whoever their husband tells them to.
8) Whoever decided that Ohio should have FEWER voting machines than in 2000 despite the surge in voter registration. I'm not convinced Ohio got counted correctly amid all the provisional balloting nonsense and 5-hour lines.
9) Anyone who supports a war but expects someone else, or someone else's son/daughter, to fight it.
10) Anyone who thinks it should be illegal for 10% of the population to marry someone they love.
11) Californians who don't think medium- and large-sized companies should have to give their employees health insurance. Want to bet these same people are against the welfare-type health benefits most uninsured people have to use instead?
12) John McCain, because I think if he'd admitted he hates Bush, Kerry could have taken Arizona.
13) I cannot go any further, because I'm too depressed to be as angry as I should be. Dammit.
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
Why, God, Why?
Dear Red States,
What brand of lube did you use to get your head that far up your ass?
Just curious,
-Jen
Dear Red States,
What brand of lube did you use to get your head that far up your ass?
Just curious,
-Jen
Two Americas, Indeed
Dear Red States,
What in the hell are you thinking?
You may secede now. No, really. Go ahead.
Love,
-Jen
Dear Red States,
What in the hell are you thinking?
You may secede now. No, really. Go ahead.
Love,
-Jen
Monday, November 01, 2004
Couldn't we have spread this out a bit?
Daylight savings and the accompanying disorientation (it's like being hung over). Halloween (I thought I'd be crushed to death at the West Hollywood parade). The Santa Ana winds coming in and making Southern California loco (and ill. Tough to train for a marathon when you suddenly have trouble swallowing). Dia de los Muertos, and no time to attend any events. First of the month; write those checks. My eighth graders have quarterly assessments tomorrow and Wednesday, and there's nothing else I can do to get them up to snuff. I'm still recovering from being out all night Friday. How many NaNoWriMo novelists are writing dystopias, or will be soon? As I type this, the lights in my apartment occasionally blink off, and then back on.
I hate to think how much more wrong the world could seem tomorrow.
Daylight savings and the accompanying disorientation (it's like being hung over). Halloween (I thought I'd be crushed to death at the West Hollywood parade). The Santa Ana winds coming in and making Southern California loco (and ill. Tough to train for a marathon when you suddenly have trouble swallowing). Dia de los Muertos, and no time to attend any events. First of the month; write those checks. My eighth graders have quarterly assessments tomorrow and Wednesday, and there's nothing else I can do to get them up to snuff. I'm still recovering from being out all night Friday. How many NaNoWriMo novelists are writing dystopias, or will be soon? As I type this, the lights in my apartment occasionally blink off, and then back on.
I hate to think how much more wrong the world could seem tomorrow.
